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What To Do When Caring for a Person Who Has Dementia, Viciously Affects You

If you’re caregiving for someone close to you that suffers from dementia and you currently feel sad, alone, despaired, or even angry, guilty, and hopeless

Know this… In the face of this chronic illness, it is understandable and even normal to feel this way.

Yet the question remains…

How do you deal with something like this?

Every family is unique.

People have different ways of dealing with their emotions.

But in spite of our differences though, we’re very much alike.

That’s why I don’t believe there’s a RIGHT or WRONG way to handle emotions… Only EFFICIENTLY or INEFFICIENTLY!

What’s most important is to be SELF-AWARE of HOW you feel and to have some understanding of WHY you feel that way.

Because when you recognize and acknowledge your feelings, you make better CHOICES. 

Let’s say you are angry at your Mom because once again she made a mess of your kitchen. 

She left the stove on at 3 am because she thought it was time to start baking a cake. Her way of celebrating your home-coming from college during Christmas vacation 1985!

You decided not to yell at her because you know it can make her behavior worse. So is it good for you to repress your anger?

Well is not about repressing the anger, if it made you angry …IT’S TOO FREAKING LATE!

You have to ELEVATE your thinking!

The key here is to recognize your Mom’s behavior is a product of the disease, …SHE’S SICK!

The moment you figure this out your attitude will change. 

You’ll feel less frustrated and angry, and you’ll take better care of her.

The caregiving hack here is simple:

Don’t judge your emotions as right or wrong.

Instead, REFRAME the issue from a different perspective. 

RISE ABOVE the circumstances and OWN the outcome from the Get-Go!

This is how you CRACK THE CODE to the traumatizing, unexpected and immobilizing effects of negative emotions such as anger, embarrassment, helplessness, guilt, grief, depression, and worry

And start feeling positive emotions. Like gratitude, joy, hope, serenity, kindness, inspiration, and love.

Regardless of what you are feeling, remember it’s OK to feel that way… but NOT OK to not recognize it, or not know why!

Hope you can put this knowledge to good use, but if you are good to go… share it with someone you feel could use it. Thank you!

Claudio Alegre

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