What To Do If Your Siblings Won’t Help With Parent’s Caregiving

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A common scenario right?  You may be going through it right now…

As with most things in caregiving, urgent communication, action, and transparency is pretty much 50% of the battle my friends.

It’s important to remain cool, calm, and collected. Even if you are upset and frustrated to no end because you are the one brother or sister who’s been bearing the brunt of your parent’s care, here’s what I have to say to you!

You are not doing it to expect gratitude or praise from anyone else, you are not doing because there’s such a thing a cosmic karma, or even because through a family agreement you are actually being paid for it, if that were an option…

You are doing it because it’s your Mom or Dad, and it’s the right thing to do!

So drop the anger, self-pity, need for recognition, and the lonesome hero act.

Stop asking for help, you don’t need them. They are in denial or not prioritizing the situation, and one day will regret not being part of the most selfless human act possible, taking care of the people who gave them everything. You only get one chance in life to repay back what your parents did for you, and YOU are doing it!

Be proud, not angry…

Here’s another reason you don’t need them:  You are a caregiving ninja! 

1. You will go to your State website and find the National Family Caregivers Support program (FLORIDA), then you’ll contact the Alzheimer’s Association and find endless caregiving training, workshops and resources.

2. You will also contact your local senior help groups and get some respite through the Local Elder Companion volunteers and who knows you may even create your own local support group with other family caregivers not getting help from their siblings either!

3. You will go to this caregiving support resources post written by the head of all-time caregiving Super Ninjas, Maria de los Angeles, and read it to learn even more ways to surround yourself with the right people and build your caregiving team.

You will find a way, you will get it done, and you’ll be a better person, son/daughter for it.

HAVING SAID THAT…!

Don’t give up on your siblings so easy. Even if they give you the 4 more popular excuses to not help:

  • I don’t have time
  • I don’t have money
  • I can’t bear to watch Mom/Dad that way
  • I live too far

Even with these excuses, keep trying, any little help is good for everyone. Open new lines of communication, get the family together in a light and easy going atmosphere and bring up the topic as natural conversation.

In the end they will thank you for pushing hard and not giving up on getting them involved. No one said doing the right thing was going to be easy!

Even then, you’ll know when to fight and when to let go. One thing’s for sure …you don’t need anyone’s permission to do the right thing!

320x320_crop_claudiopic –Claudio Alegre is the Chief Content Writer for Angel Home Care Services on the Web and Patient and Family Relations Advocate off the Web. He lives in Miami with his wife and 3 boys.

 

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ATTENTION! Free Report Reveals Secret Formula For Getting Elder Care at Home …without going broke in the process!

We find ways to help families get the personal care services at home they need and deserve regardless of the insurance landscape or personal situation!

Call us With Your Questions or Concerns and Get Rid of All That Doubt and Uncertainty! 

CALL:   305-220-4544   [Miami Dade Area]

1-877-746-8908   [For Out of Area Families]

 

 

The Supply and Demand of Caring and How The Best Caregivers Get Better

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“You don’t stop laughing when you grow old, you grow old when you stop laughing.”
― George Bernard Shaw

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ATTENTION! Free Report Reveals Secret Formula For Getting Elder Care at Home …without going broke in the process!

Caregivers get pulled, stretched, pushed, shoved, knocked and grilled by so many elements of their daily grind.

It never ceases to amaze and delight me when I meet or talk to a caregiver whose attitude is pure hope, optimism and grit.

Such is the case with Mr. Smith, whose wife has a chronic condition that has her confined to a bed indefinitely.

Lately we’ve been struggling with getting him a much needed item on time and ample supply.

Not our fault, but it doesn’t matter! As an Agency we are responsible for solving problems.

Mr. Smith calls our office quite often in regards to this item. He’s very concerned, but courteous and understanding of the realities of a healthcare system that’s not perfect but it’s what we have.

We are in short supply of this item, he knows it, I can feel the frustration in his voice. He is torn by what he feels and what he won’t say. I know that and it frustrates me, we have to fix this now!

Our medical supplies company has let us down time and time again, why are we still with them?

It’s Friday 5:30pm, the Mr. Smith is out of supplies and my supplier is not picking up the phone. I’ve had enough!

I call the local retail supplier for that specific item, they have 4 of them left, I buy them at three and a half times my normal cost, but I don’t care at this point. I’m obsessed with not putting us and Mr. Smith/caregiver in this position again!

I bought enough to last me the weekend. First thing Monday I fired our existing supplier and called a well know local wholesaler … it’s a long shot, these guys sell by the pallet, large shipments overseas and only to large domestic suppliers. We are a small family-ran home care agency with a problem they couldn’t possibly relate to or care about!

But I asked anyway, it so happens they are starting a division in their company to service smaller providers in our local area, they literally started this last week. I was their first client!

My item was so unique they didn’t have it in stock, but the HERO I was dealing with went out of his way to set me up, he already knew my story and totally identified with it. I was blown away!

I ordered a total of 8 boxes, at better pricing than my original supplier. I’m also making a list of other supplies we will order from this company from now on. That’s how you build loyalty, you help people solve problems.

I personally delivered the units to Mr. Smith, I could see the relief in his face and felt the gratitude in his handshake.

But Mr. Smith also taught me a lesson that I think all caregivers should take notice of.

Here are a few caregiving tips that will make you THRIVE instead of just cope:

  1. Work to find solutions to your problems, not problems in the solutions.Mr. Smith patiently worked through this particular issue with us and together we got it done.
  2. Build a human relationship with your provider and learn to leverage the professional help around you. Mr. Smith is always courteous and respectful of the nurses and case managers he came in contact with, and they learned to appreciate him as much as he appreciates them. In the process he learned how things work.
  3. Never despair. Even though there were times when we were all frustrated, neither Mr. Smith nor We gave up.
  4. Keep a positive attitude. As I said at the start, Mr. Smith attitude dictates his outcome and process, as with all things in life. I think he understands there are few things you control, but one’s attitude is definitely one you can.

No one takes a journey alone. Let’s learn from each other!

By the way the Hero who saved the day is Luis Arias from Surgimed – Located at 1303 NW 78 Ave, Doral FL 33126 | 305.594.1121. If you are a provider and need a reliable medical supplies company, get in touch with Luis.

Further reading:

Thank you so much for reading! If you enjoyed it, please scroll down and click the Recommend button and Share on your favorite Social Network. It would mean a lot to me :-)

Keep Caring-

Claudio

320x320_crop_claudiopicClaudio Alegre is the Chief Content Writer for Angel Home Care Services on the Web and Patient and Family Relations Advocate off the Web. He lives in Miami with his wife and 3 boys.

 

We find ways to help families get the personal care services at home they need and deserve regardless of the insurance landscape or personal situation!

Call us With Your Questions or Concerns and Get Rid of All That Doubt and Uncertainty! 

CALL:   305-220-4544   [Miami Dade Area]

1-877-746-8908   [For Out of Area Families]

17 Not-So-Obvious But Unmistakable Warning Signs Your Parent Is Declining in Function and Will Soon Need Help at Home

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Wrinkles should merely indicate where smiles have been. ~Mark Twain, Following the Equator

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ATTENTION! Free Report Reveals Secret Formula For Getting Elder Care at Home …without going broke in the process!

You know instinctively this day is coming. The day when the next call you’ll get could be from a neighbor, a police officer, or just a total stranger who is trying to help your wandering and disoriented parent. The day when they can no longer shop, bathe, or eat by themselves. They day when they call you by a different name.

Any one scenario above can be pre-planned or even avoided. The key is to know what signs to look for!

It’s amazing how much pain and frustration a little bit of planing can save you when the time comes to face a parent’s inevitable decline into a state of permanent convalescence.

The question is, when that day comes  —Will they have the foundation OF care YOU planned and created for them?

Now remember, these are not signs that they need help URGENTLY …but rather not-so-obvious warning signs that NOW it’s the time to start planning some sort of Home Care or personalized caregiver program.

Not knowing these NOT-SO-OBVIOUS warning signs is why almost everyone gets caught unprepared and tool-less.

The result is they are now forced to rush decisions at the worse possible time.

So here they are, 17 warning signs that if you are paying attention and like a detective, uncover the right clues, you will save yourself and your parent a mountain of pain and suffering!

Why?

Because you now know what to look for, and if you know what to look for you can plan ahead.

So be on the look out for:
  1. Frequent falls, visible cuts and bruises.
  2. Need the help of walker to get around house.
  3. When normal conversation stops or takes a depressing tone.
  4. Change in appearance and mood.
  5. No longer interested in activities and fun events.
  6. Excessive arguing and fly-off-the-handle type temper.
  7. Unopened meds and unfilled prescriptions.
  8. Lack of personal hygiene and bathing, strange odor.
  9. Noticeable weigh loss, not eating regularly.
  10. Unopened bills and personal mail.
  11. Frequent fender benders. Look for dents and scratches in car.
  12. Lack of housekeeping signs.
  13. Worsening of existing chronic conditions.
  14. Stale and expired food and drinks.
  15. Broken down house appliances and other items.
  16. Cancelling doctor visits.
  17. Excessive forgetfulness and absent mindedness.

You can complement this list with our very popular Elder Care Guide – and learn how to create a personalized Elderly Care custom plan.

This guide will show you how to build a basic support system at home for your elderly parents with limited coverage and without going broke in the process?

You’ll learn things like:

  • How to leverage the four types of Long Term Care payment sources for maximum value and minimum costs.
  • How to use our 3-Step-Process and 5-Point-Checklist and get the services you need started!
  • How to negotiate bottom line rates with caregivers and home care agencies.
  • How to quickly assess your parent’s finances for Long Term Care and other chronic health conditions …and a half a dozen other hacks and caregiving strategies!

So there you go, you now know more than 90% of everyone out there who may be facing an inevitable care giving scenario this week, but they are not armed with the tools you now have.

But let’s not keep this information all to ourselves!

If you found this post of interest and value, kindly click your favorite social button below and share.

Take care :-)

320x320_crop_claudiopicClaudio Alegre is the Chief Content Writer for Angel Home Care Services on the Web and Patient and Family Relations Advocate off the Web. He lives in Miami with his wife and 3 boys.

 

We find ways to help families get the personal care services at home they need and deserve regardless of the insurance landscape or personal situation!

Call us With Your Questions or Concerns and Get Rid of All That Doubt and Uncertainty! 

CALL:   305-220-4544   [Miami Dade Area]

1-877-746-8908   [For Out of Area Families]

10 Must Ask Questions Before Hiring a Home Health Aide

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Are you in need of a home health aide for your elderly parents or a loved one, and you don’t know how to go about it? How do you make sure this person or company are legit and not someone with a questionable background? How do you supervise or even rate the care you are getting? How much should you pay for care? Will your insurance cover it?

Not knowing the specific answers to these questions can definitely be a source of stress and fear, especially if you need to act quickly.

But no one with these kinds of needs should be afraid to ask or be ignorant about where to find the answers.

At the end of the day you want the same things we all want as far as caring for a loved one  -To ensure that they are in safe and capable hands!

[Read: When a Health Care Crisis Strikes, Where Do You Start?]

One more thing! …If you feel alone and isolated, you are not!

Roughly half of the United States population has at least one chronic condition, according to the CDC (Centers for Disease Control and Prevention). Adults ages 65 and older, 75 percent of whom have chronic conditions, are expected to make up 19 percent of the population by 2030, compared with 12 percent in 2000.

That means you are not the only family member asking those very same questions and experiencing similar fears and concerns about hiring a home health aide or caregiver.

But to help you frame a good strategy if you are ever in the market for a home health aide, here are 10 questions you should ask the agency you are considering working with:

  • What are your recruitment process and your hiring requirements for home health aides?
  • Are your home health aides insured and bonded through the agency?
  • How do you assess their skills?
  • How often do you perform supervision visits?
  • In the event the home health aide is unable to perform how quickly can you substitute the help?
  • If I’m dissatisfied with the home health aide can I request a replacement “without cause”?
  • Are your home health aides up to date with their CEUs (continuing education units)?
  • Do you hire experienced health aides or newly graduated ones?
  • Do you consult with families regarding available community programs that provide personal care and health aide?
  • What other services in addition to home health aide do you provide for families?

Don’t limit yourself to these questions only. If you come up with other questions you feel are important please share them with us. You can do so at our Facebook Page –The Daily Pill, or just simply call us at 305.220.4544

In the meantime grab our FREE Long Term Care Report – An elderly care guide for the times we live in! …and learn how to create a personalized Long Term Care custom plan.

Until next time!

Oh! …and if you found this post of interest and value, please hit your favorite social button below and share :-)

320x320_crop_claudiopicClaudio Alegre is the Chief Content Writer for Angel Home Care Services on the Web and Patient and Family Relations Advocate off the Web. He lives in Miami with his wife and 3 boys.

 

Alzheimer’s Battles Will Be Fought With Brains, But Winning The War Will Be All Heart

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The cost of Alzheimer’s care has been rising rapidly for the past 15 years… and it shows no sign of stopping.  Not only that, the percentage of seniors with Alzheimer’s is on a steep steady climb.

It is now considered an epidemic, between 2010 and 2050, the number of people with Alzheimer’s is expected to jump from 5.5 million to 14 million.

Alzheimer’s currently kills more people than breast cancer and prostate cancer combined. It’s the only disease in the top ten that can’t be slowed, stopped or prevented.

[Read: When a Health Care Crisis Strikes, Where Do You Start?]

Here’s a figure I couldn’t believe when I first read it, where as cancer has a 90% disclosure rate, Alzheimer’s has only a 46% disclosure rate, meaning more than half of the people that are diagnosed are not being told. That includes caregivers as well. We are not doing a good job educating and having the tough conversations.

The financial toll is also staggering. This year it will cost this nation $226 Billion dollars to care for people with AD. By 2050 we could be topping $1 Trillion.

In a study by The Lewin Group, it was revealed that within 10 years, Medicare’s costs of treating Alzheimer’s patients will soar well above 49.3 billion dollars.

See our Family Long Term Care Custom Guide for tips on how to get the help you need even if your insurance won’t cover and you don’t have mega bucks to spare!

As of the time the study was released in 2004, Medicare beneficiaries with Alzheimer’s disease accounted for 34% of Medicare spending, even though they constitute only 12.8% of the population age 65 and older.

This is happening even though Medicare does not pay for the long-term care that people with Alzheimer’s disease need. It is happening because 95% of Medicare beneficiaries with dementia have other chronic conditions common in the elderly, which are exacerbated by their dementia.

The fact of the matter is, Medicare only cares about the rehab potential of your condition, and conditions such as AD and Parkinson’s have little if any rehab potential.

If someone suffers a heart attack or a stroke, and there’s potential for rehab, they’ll continue to pay… but only up to 100 days.  In reality, very few people know the difference between Medicare and Medicaid.  Medicare simply doesn’t pay for long-term, chronic care.  If your loved one has Alzheimer’s, that means that they’ll have to rely on Medicaid if they are out of money to pay privately for care.

You can see the massive predicament you can find yourself in when the average per-person Medicare spending for those with Alzheimer’s and other dementias is three times higher than average per-person spending across all other seniors. Yet Medicare won’t cover the long term effects of AD.

Regarding Medicaid, the expenditures associated with Alzheimer’s disease are high because of the uninsured cost of long-term care.

Nearly half of Medicare beneficiaries with Alzheimer’s disease and Dementia also qualify for Medicaid, because they have exhausted their own resources paying for long term care.

At least half of all nursing home residents have dementia. They are the residents with the longest stays and the ones most likely to spend down to Medicaid.

You have options, but you have to understand what the disease process, laws and healthcare regulations are and how you or a loved can leverage them to your needs and advantage.

[Read: 2015 Alzheimer’s Disease Facts and Figures]

To beat Alzheimer’s we are going to have to work as a team, because Alzheimer’s wears you down, it’s not a single person affliction, it strikes all of us in one way or another, as a son, daughter, husband, wife, friend and caregiver.

Alzheimer’s Battles Will Be Fought With Brains, But Winning The War Will Be All Heart.”

For strategies on how to pay for Long Term Care you can’t afford and your insurance won’t cover, we’ve put together a Custom Guide that will show you the options you have to care for a loved one with Alzheimer’s or Dementia without going broke in the process.

So grab our FREE Long Term Care ReportAn elderly care guide for the times we live in! …and find out how you can start making sense of all this.

 

Oh! …and if you found this post of interest and value, please hit your favorite social button below and share :-)